Onion Dip and Chip Update

I made the onion dip from scratch

What's astonishing is how much they shrink:



The dip was great. The chips were done on a mandolin with no loss of fingers and fried in bacon fat. Delicious!

Scratch That

I know I sometimes get silly about food. Sometimes I say to myself things like "Why buy a baguette when you can make one yourself?" So I go the whole hog. I go out and buy baguette trays. I try to make sourdough starter from scratch. I wait days for dough to rise, all in the quest for "authenticité." I fail. I try again. I succeed.

I want to make raviolis from scratch. I research the process. I order books from Amazon entitled "Making Raviolis At Home." I buy an Imperial pasta machine, with electric motor, drying racks for the pasta. I fail. I try again. I succeed.

I want to make pizza from scratch. I buy pizza pans, pizza stones, pizza grids, San Marzano tomatoes, Mozzarella di Bufalo, the finest Rosette de Lyon salami, the freshest garlic. I fail. I try again. I succeed.

I want to make dill pickles from scratch. I buy Mason jars and tongs. I research the process. I fail. I try again. I succeed.

I want to make sausages from scratch. I buy a meat grinder. I buy pork butt and salt pork; I spend an entire day making sausages. I don't fail (you can't fail making sausages).

I want to make egg rolls from scratch. Okay, that is easy enough to make it worth it.


But after all this, I ask myself, Why? Why do I want to make a baguette when I can just hop to the corner and buy a very good one for $1.80? Why do I want to make raviolis when perfectly serviceable ones can be had from Capitol for $6.99? Why do I want to make pizza when I hardly ever eat it anyway and making it from scratch is expensive and time-consuming?

Dill pickles? Well, they're so easy that it's hard not to justify making them from scratch.

Sausages? They have great ones at Jean-Talon market. Just go, pick, buy, sauté. Better than mine and a hell of a lot cheaper.

Still, I love a challenge. Make my own mozzarella? Intriguing. Just to DO IT. I used to make my own beer. Very, very challenging, but the end result was so satisfying. I MADE THIS. A multinational corporation did not make this. It may not taste like the beer I get at the store, but THAT'S WHY IT'S SO GOOD.

Thus, I present my latest challenge: French Onion Dip from scratch with homemade potato chips.

Here's how I see it in my mind's eye (not made yet -- just a theoretical recipe, which I will do on the weekend):

French Onion Dip with Chipotle Peppers

Ingredients:

1 large container (not the medium sized ones) full-fat sour cream
3 tablespoons olive oil
1/4 cup Japanese mayonnaise (Kewpie brand -- inquire at your Asian market)
2 large Vidalia onions, chopped in a medium dice (about 4 cups)
2 large cloves fresh garlic (the kind that still have the scapes on them and you have to refrigerate), roasted
1 bunch green onions (scallions), sliced into thin rounds
2 tablespoons juice from can of chipotle peppers in adobo sauce (La Costena comes to mind)
1 tablespoon cilantro, finely chopped
I tablespoon white wine vinegar
Salt and pepper to taste
Parsley sprigs for garnish


Method

Bring nonstick sauté pan to medium heat with olive oil. When simmering, toss in onions. Stirring fairly often, sauté until deep brown and caramelized, approximately 40 minutes. Do not leave unattended. Add garlic, mix well. Sauté another five minutes. remove from heat, chill.

When thoroughly chilled, blend with rest of ingredients, allow to mix overnight in refrigerator. When serving, garnish with sprigs of parsley.

Homemade Potato Chips

Ingredients

2 large russet potatoes
Vegetable oil, bacon oil or duck fat, one inch deep in sauté pan
Chile powder
Salt and pepper to taste

Method

Using a mandolin, slice the potatoes no more than 1/32 of an inch thick. Place slices in ice water.

Heat oil on medium until a drop of water spatters in the pan. Drain and pat potato slices extremely dry with paper towels; layer them between paper towels if you have to. Get a bowl ready with paper towel liner to receive potato chips.

In small batches to avoid bringing the temperature of the oil down too low, fry the potato slices until just golden brown. Remove with a spider and leave to drain on paper towels in bowl. If necessary, place done chips in metal bowl in 200-degree oven to keep warm while you fry the rest of the potatoes.

Sprinkle with condiments and serve immediately with onion dip.

Miniature Dinner

Okay, here's the deal. An "anti-massive-portion-trend" dinner, if you will. Not just small portions of ordinary food, mind you, but small versions of traditional food.

Nothing fancy. Just imagine a typical American-style menu:

Quail deviled eggs.

You'd bring some water to the boil with about ten quail eggs. Let them sit for five minutes off heat. Cold-shock them. Remove the yolks, mix with mayonnaise, mustard, shallots, paprika etc. etc. and there you'd have it. An appetizer. Others might be stuffed cherry tomatoes. Or stuffed baby shrimp (pull that one off, why dontcha!)

Main courses? Maybe guinea-hen burgers, ground from scratch. Really, really tiny, maybe just an inch and a half across and 1/3 of an inch thick. Charcoal grilled, of course. With pearl red onion slices and cherry tomatoes sliced ever-so-fine and some form of cheese literally 1/32 of an inch thick. Hmm, the rolls would be a problem. I'll have to think about that. Baby lettuce as garnish.

Side dish would be super-fine julienned fingerling potatoes fried in duck fat for, like two minutes. Or could I risk trying to make twice-baked miniature potatoes? My Microplane grater would grate the cheese to ultra-feathery levels. Could be done! Instead of having to plow though a half a baked russet, you'd just pop this in your mouth and it would be gone in one bite.

Then, maybe mini-stuffed baby veal rolls. Couscous instead of rice. Everything as miniature as possible. The wine, Pommery '64 in 375ml bottles served in children's glasses.

A SMALL dinner party, to fit with my budget.

Yes, I think it could be done.